Just found this video. Its an hour long, but shows how we're made. If you've got time to kill, check it out.
OT: Welcome to my Marine Corps...
- Thread starter BigtimeAub
- Start date
My brothers in Syria right now doing work for our Patron Saint of Chaos, Lord Gen. Mattis....
@BigtimeAub
I have a funny story for you. So my platoon always held the series guidon and I carried the mfer. As you know, every time we left the squad bay it was my job to grab the guidon. Well, I would always forget the damn thing. The DI would say, "get outside, now". What would I do? I would run my ass outside and you don't/can't turn around to go back in. I would be standing in front the formation thinking to myself, "MFER, I forgot the GD guidon again". Sure enough the DI would have the mfer in his hands screaming, "RECRUIT JOHNSON". Then he would throw the damn thing and I would have to dive for it. Oh, when I first started carrying it a DI from another platoon came up to me and said, "give me the guidon". So, I handed it to him. I about got my ass kicked and I had no idea why. LULZ
I have a funny story for you. So my platoon always held the series guidon and I carried the mfer. As you know, every time we left the squad bay it was my job to grab the guidon. Well, I would always forget the damn thing. The DI would say, "get outside, now". What would I do? I would run my ass outside and you don't/can't turn around to go back in. I would be standing in front the formation thinking to myself, "MFER, I forgot the GD guidon again". Sure enough the DI would have the mfer in his hands screaming, "RECRUIT JOHNSON". Then he would throw the damn thing and I would have to dive for it. Oh, when I first started carrying it a DI from another platoon came up to me and said, "give me the guidon". So, I handed it to him. I about got my ass kicked and I had no idea why. LULZ
Someone is having a really, really bad day down range.
Sounds like the guide for my platoon. He knew he f'ed up as soon as he handed to another DI. I guess that's just a game they play with every guide for every platoon. They had him doing all kinds of tricks to "earn" it back. Then my whole platoon got smoked in the sand pit for his stupidity.
We mark timed march for 2 hours. No shit, 2 hours.
I mean being a marine is cool, you get to shoot guns, get babes, etc but I am an accountant and get to work 90hr weeks in front of spreadsheets.
Tbh the week one strength and conditioning I could knock out in half the time (I run the 1.5 mile in 10mins though). Yelling wouldn't bother me. Killing wouldn't bother me. I always thought it was harder.
Edit: don't mean that with any disrespect btw. I just mean I'd probably make it through week one and love every second. Except the waking up at 5am. **** that.
Week 1 is to break you down mentally. The video doesn't show the spitting, hitting and a lot of other bullshit. Within 20 min of meeting my drill instructors I took a boot to my dick.
Every person I've ever met says those exact same things. Then they get there and turn into a complete and total shit show. That video, admittedly, makes it look like a walk in the park. As for the yelling, that is how every word you mutter is sounded off for the entire three months that you're there. The video of the DI's in the recruits face is much more accurate, and is constant all day long, everyday. And honestly, yes, week one is a cake walk compared to the rest of it. But by the time you get to week 10, you've become so numb to everything that you're just reacting to every command at that point so everything seems easier but it's actually not. The hardest part of it is the way the break you down mentally the first 8 weeks. Everything you do is too slow, and wrong, no matter how fast and correct it is. The repetitiveness of the most simple and basic tasks, like putting your socks on, can be the most daunting of tasks.
Exactly. That was an "official" video. The real stuff isn't shown.
yeah that sounds hard. I figured it was something I wasn't seeing because doing 25 pushups in 3 mins is legit cake and running a 15 min 1.5 mile is barely jogging for most in shape men. I understand what you guys are saying, I know I don't have the full picture or anything. Just speaking candidly.
That's just the initial PFT. It doesn't count for shit other than to let the DI's know if you're in good enough shape to stay with your platoon or send you to PCP (can't remember what it stand for but it's where they send the fat kids to do nothing but PT until they can pass it and then they pick back up with another platoon to continue their training. The final PFT is a 3miler in 28 minutes, 3 pull ups and something like 70 sit-ups. But by the point your average scores are probably closer to 22 minutes, 10 pull-ups (dead hang and no kipping allowed), and 100 sit-ups. The PT part isn't hard at all, and by the end of training, Most actually look forward to PT because it means that you're outside of the barracks, in view of the "public" and you're not just getting f'ed with constantly for no seamingly good reason.
When I left boot I was doing 17 pull ups(dead hang), 100 sit ups and 18:57 on the 3 miler and I was far from being one of the best. We had a guy who rock climbed in our platoon. That asshole could do 20 dead hang pull ups with only using two fingers on each hand. It was unreal! He tried to break the Paris Island record, but failed miserably. My DI ran the 3 miler with us in like 16 min.
There was a kid in my platoon, was there as a 90 day reservist (I still never figured out what in the actual hell that was) that ran a perfect PFT and out ran the Company 1Sgt who was on the Marine Corps official Iron Man team. Apparently this kid had ran a couple of Iron Man comps before he joined and actually place in 1. There was an Iron Man comp that was about to go down in FL and the Marine Corps just lost a team member to an injury, they pulled this guy out of boot camp and sent him down as a replacement. Never heard from him again. He looked like a white Ethiopian. On the initial PFT, kid ran his 3 miles at 15:50, did 35 pullups before they made him stop, and did his 200 situps before just stopping with time still left on the clock. But, he was a scared little boy. Even pissed himself in formation one day because he was too scared to ask to go to the head. The DI's wouldn't let him change after that and he was right beside me in formation. That cat reeked of piss for the rest of the day.
We had guys who would piss themselves on the parade deck while drilling. One guy was so scared to ask for permission that he would pull his dick out while sitting Indian style and piss in one of his canteens. Well, he drank out of the wrong canteen one day. lulz
So many funny stories looking back.
There are so many little things that happened that are absolutely hilarious now. And I think of new ones every day. The morning we marched out to the rifle range, I missed our head call. I had to piss so bad that I just pulled it out and pissed all over the back of the guys legs in front of me. He had no idea and I never said anything. Fortunately, about an hour into our march, it started pouring down rain (and that reminds me of another story, and a story within that story).
We had two guys in particular in our platoon that were royal F ups. One looked just like Drew Carey. His name was Sheese, but we called him Cheese. The other guy, looked (and was built) just like Gary Coleman. His name was Porter and we called him Porter P. Every time we went to the chow hall, they were the last two in line. We had to sit and wait at our tables for them to get there before we were allowed to eat. Actually, the other platoon that we were partnered with in our Company had to wait too. They would get to the table and put their trays down and then stand at attention. Our SDI would say "Let's hear it, Porter P!" and Porter P would shrill at the top of his lungs "Whatchu talkin' bout, Willis?" After that, the SDI would say "Your turn, Cheese Wagon!" and Cheese would belt out the Drew Carey theme song as loud as he could. It was f'ing hilarous. But you didn't dare even crack a smile. I'll never forget those two guys as long as I live.
Which brings me back to the rifle range and Cheese. The second day that we were out there, it's still raining (remember when I said it started raining while marching out there?). Also, do you remember passing by a huge, open, grassy field right before you get to the barracks? Well, instead of going outside to start grass week, our DI's had us push all of the racks and footlockers to the back wall and had some recruits drag in a few of the snap-in barrels. A couple of hours into snapping in (sitting indian style while aiming your rifle at a little black dot on a metal drum that's painted white, for those of you that are not Marines trying to follow along), f'ing Cheese just stands up out of nowhere and starts shouting "This recruit needs some water! This recruit is feeling over heated and dehydrated, sir!" (Mind you, we're in our squad bay, with air conditioning, and we haven't done anything all day besides sit indian style on a hard assed concrete floor for hours on end.) Our DI's absolutely lose their shit. So how do you think they responded? They make us grab all of our stuff, war gear, rifles, alice packs, everything, and march us over to this big grassy field while it's monsooning outside. There is about a solid 10-12" of water standing in this field. It looks like a small lake. One of the DI's yells "since Cheese is dehydrated, we're going to help him find some f'ing water." We proceeded to low crawl back and forth across this damned field for the next three hours. I've never been so swamped and raw in all of my life. When we finally went back inside, that's when we discovered all of our footlockers dumped into one huge pile in the middle of the squad bay. Range week was the absolute worst part of my experience at Parris Island. That's the point I just got pissed off at the world and went completely mentally numb to damn near everything. I'm still not completely over it and still have some relapses.
Last edited:
Speaking of grass week. It should be hell week. I thought my legs were going to fall off.
Similar threads
